Shattered

The following is a complete re-write of a short story I wrote 9 years ago to cope with my break-up. I rewrote it because thought I could do better. I personally believe I succeeded, not to toot my own horn. Enjoy!

On a May afternoon, 16-year-old Kyle sat by the phone, lost in thought while waiting for a call from his girl. He was lost in the memories of prom, which had taken place the night before. Lost in thought with the treasured memories of slow dancing with Valerie. The feeling of her soft blonde hair sweeping across his face as he held her close whispering a promise in her ear. A promise of his commitment to her. That he would never leave her. He thought about the slow, passionate kiss that ended the perfect night prior. He also thought about the experience of handing her a promise ring a week and a half prior. How his heart raced. How his palms became sweaty and clammy while handing her the ring.

Suddenly, his 8-year-old little brother Daniel entered the room looking for a toy he had lost earlier, thus snapping Kyle back to the present. While Daniel looked, Kyle proceeded to tell his brother that he was deeply in love with Valerie. That he felt like he may have found his “the one”. Daniel, in turn, reacted with disgust. “Yuck! How could you even say that? Girls are disgusting!” Enraged by the comments, Kyle picked up a pillow and threw it at his brother. Daniel fell over from the impact and hit his head against the wall. Daniel stood up with tears in his eyes and ran out of the room screaming “I’m telling Mom!” Kyle didn’t care.

Finally, at about 5:30 that evening, the phone rang. It was Valerie. Kyle answered with much enthusiasm and started to ramble on about how much he misses her, how much he loved her, how much he had thought of the night before. Before long, however, Kyle discerned that something wasn’t right. “What’s wrong, Val?” Valerie, audibly upset, responded in a split second. “Kyle, I have to break up with you.” Kyle’s heart sank. “B-but, why?” “I have some problems at home, and I can’t handle having a boyfriend right now. I’m sorry.” “Why? Did last night not mean anything to you?” “Kyle, please. This is already hard. Don’t make this harder.” “Why can’t we stay together and let me be there for you?” “Kyle, stop. I just...I…I can’t.” Valerie hung up the phone crying. Kyle quietly put the phone down as his eyes began to fill with tears.

Enough is enough! Time to take a stand!

My fellow conservatives. Enough is enough. I have spent a few years watching you guys comment on articles online and I've come to a conclusion. You guys get riled up but then do hardly anything of substance. You also discount our opposition. What you, my fellow conservatives, fail to realize and do anything about is that we are losing the culture war. You are not spreading the ideas of freedom that conservatism is about. All I hear is this, that and the other thing is idiocy and wrong.

I'm not telling you that you can't have an opinion on what you find morally and socially wrong. But we cannot continue to fail to deliver our message of our idea of freedom. Freedom to make mistakes. Freedom to learn from them. Freedom to sin, and then ultimately freedom to get on our knees and beg forgiveness from the Almighty.

We are losing the culture war and all I see conservatives do is insult each other and the opposition on the internet. How are you helping win for America by insulting people? You're not.

Good-bye to Legacy

I never got to write or say a formal good-bye to Legacy yet, so here goes.

I have been in XGN since December 17, 2012. I was recruited by who was at the time XGN DUBSTEP (now XGN OH DANG). My first couple weeks in XGN were weak at best. I didn't attend any meetings, didn't do anything with the clan. I just continued to hang out with my non-XGN friends like I always had. Had the full intention of never going higher than MSG and never changing my name.

Then it happened. On the second Monday of my being in XGN I attended a meeting. The rest was, as they say, history. I missed only 3 meetings from that point on, due to only sickness. I ranked up under XGN Aztec 7 as my general. First to a CPL, then a SSG, a MSG and then I hit staff not long after our split that formed Delirium. I was a 4CPT. I remember this day quite well. I remember it so well because it was just before a squad meeting and Jerry pulled me in to a party and tricked me in to thinking I was being demoted only to hand me a promotion to 4CPT.

Not long after that, Jerry was gone, as was my recruiter. OH DANG moved on to MAJ of Carnage, Jerry moved on to Cofo. XGN Relic VII was now my general and a great friend he would become. I spent nearly all my time hanging out with him when I wasn't doing my duties as now 3CPT. A month goes by, we deal with several hardships and recruiting stagnations. It's now mid-February and I'm a 2CPT, my recruiter is gone from GoD and is now the MAJ of DEMONIC in PoW.

Legacy is getting full again, getting ready to split again. I learn that I'm in line for a MAJ spot as my MAJ, XGN Syndicate 7, who was presumably getting the split squad, wants me to be his MAJ. After a couple weeks of thinking, I agree and we start to think of names for the new squad. Legacy fills out again. We get ready to split only to learn we would not be splitting traditionally, but instead sending people to help out two squad that were in desperate need of members. Relic was promoted to Cofo, Syndicate 7 is named General of Legacy, I'm Major of Legacy.

I spend the next week acting like the general of Legacy in large absence of Legacy's real general. Completing the unusual split, getting Legacy going again. And we were off. A week after I became Major, I become restless at the lack of my General being there, I petition to have him removed and have someone else put in his place that will actually do the job.

It happens. Syndicate is removed and placed at 1CPT. I was named General of Legacy. I spend the next ~70 days mentoring new staff, new members. Leading Legacy to the greatness it became known for under Relic and Aztec's reigns as General of Legacy. I had big shoes to fill. And for the longest time, it was working. I had people telling me they loved being in Legacy, they loved me as their general. I had built friendship, and, inadvertently, loyalty. I was friends with many of the other generals and majors in GoD and, in one case, their children who were also in XGN. I was well respected General with a good track record. I lived through drama occasionally, but nothing I couldn't handle. Including the departure of my second general, Relic, from XGN.

I had to stand up for my guys a couple time, one of those getting me in trouble for forgetting chain of command in my haste to defend my guy. In the end, I had respect. The respect of my squad, even the respect of the higher ups. Then drama hit this past week and it went bye-bye in a hurry. I won't go in to detail, there's those of you that already know what happened, and those of you that don't, well I'm sorry I can't tell you. Not now anyway.

In the end, I was removed as general of Legacy, nearly 2-and-a-half months after my reign started. I immediately got a division transfer and hooked back up with my recruiter in Asylum in PoW and my first general, Aztec who is Co-Div in PoW.

This was really hard to do. Legacy will always be my home in XGN. It pains me so that it ended the way it did. Good-bye, Legacy, I love and will miss you all. Don't forget me. And don't forget to give your next permanent general a chance.

I'll see you down the road sometime. God bless.

Meeting hate with hate is a net negative

Over the past few days I've seen one of my favorite conservative pages on Facebook get progressively more and more hateful towards liberals and then defend it saying "we can't afford to be nice anymore! If you don't like that, then you're against us!"

I don't buy that, Why does hate have to be met with hate to preserve our God given rights? How are we any better than them if we met their hate with hate of our own. This is not a union, this is a poo slinging fight. I've said it before and I'll say it again: if we meet the liberal's intolerance and hate with some of our own, we're no better fit to lead this country back to greatness than they are.

This country is called the UNITED Stated of America, and boy we couldn't be further from that. yes, it's still there by name, but in practice? No. Just,...just no.

If the liberals want to be hateful jerks, let them. Let them show the world their hateful tactics. Meanwhile let's show the world our compassion. let's show the world our charitable attitudes. There's no need to be hateful back at them. Does this mean let them walk all over you? No. But don't be hateful just to be hateful. It's unjust.

Pray. Listen. Retort politely. There's no need to be automatically hateful. If you do, you're no better than the people you're trying to discredit.

Remember, God's will will be done regardless of what we want. Remember also that God only helps those that help themselves. If you're hateful, you're not helping anyone, especially yourself.

In short, just because they're hateful, doesn't mean you have to be, despite popular opinion.

Racism still runs rampant in modern day America, and we allow it

As a follow up to my article from early this year about MLK's dream. I decided to take a deeper look at my feeling about race relations in this grand country of ours. However before I do I need to issue a disclaimer: The opinion you are about to read will likely not be popular. However, the truth sometimes isn't and I see what I'm about to say as fact. (It may even be considered to be by some, racist. But take to heart that's not what it's meant to be.) With that said, let us begin.

Last time I tackled this issue I said that I look forward to the day when I can stroll down N 5th Street with my brother-from-another-mother Kendrick screaming for joy that at last White and Black parameters no longer exist, we are just humans and God's children. I still look forward to this day, but with each passing day that goes by, I see it slip further and further away.

And that became no more apparent then almost 3 months ago on July 4th, our nation's Independence Day.